A 33-year-old East Central Texas man has told authorities a turtle, cat and squirrel and a tree all were to blame for him crashing his car in Brazos County.
The Eagle of Bryan-College Station reports the man from North Zulch told officers he swerved to avoid the critters and hit the tree.
When police arrived, the unidentified man was still in the driver's seat, unaware of his location and his speech slurred.
Police didn't buy the wrecked man's explanation and charged him with drunken driving. Records show it's his second such arrest, which now could get him a year in jail. He's free on $7,500 bond.
A witness told authorities the driver passed him on the right shoulder, hit a guardrail, left the road and struck the tree.